Outlaw Notorious

And though it’s been a long time
You’re right back where you started from
I see it in your eyes
That now you’re giving up the gun
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Journal of a Stay-at-Home Dad: June 20, 2009

And just as we pile into the minivan, the shadowed figure steps from the gray pick-up truck across street. Nolan!: 6’5’’, steel-toed boots, muddy jeans, fluorescent orange construction vest, hardhat, three days stubble on his face. He wields an axe handle. “You stay the hell away from my wife,” he shouts, stabbing the axe handle in my direction. Continue Reading

Small Rain on the Tender Herb

Firing up discarded butts for the past week, you’d begun to find yourself…in someone else’s head? Or they in yours, some type of bizarre consciousness-switch flicking on.Continue Reading

Blood and Marinara Sauce

“Hey Sergeant Baker, you wanna hear a funny story?”Continue Reading

The Redneck Sheiks of Bir Tawil

“When I began the final stage of my quest to take control of my holy soil, I did so from the opposite side of the world, here in my original, and yet again, homelandContinue Reading

BULL On Tap: Dos Equis Especial

I don’t often drink Dos Equis, but when I do, I’m reminded why I don’t.”Continue Reading

BULL On Tap: Miller High Life

The time for celebration has arrived!”Continue Reading

Saying Goodbye to Seamus

An Irish wake for a golden retriever. A dog they want to remember, a night they’d rather forget.
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Pinball Way

Places that have things called shot wheels, where all the bands play punk versions of popular, but dated songs. On Pinball Way all the arcades turn into discos after dark, and sound judgment is a scarce commodity. Continue Reading

James, Transcendent, Everyone Else, Stuck in the Mud

When Mary finds him, she’s going to punish him. He will inadvertently disarm her probably, she knows, imagining a headfirst hug at the bottom of the slide, a tangled pile, wheezing and wild with laughter. The smiling cherub laughs, anger wilts.Continue Reading